Are You Really ‘Fine’??

3 simple ways to be more honest with yourself in your life and career.

Think back to last time when someone asked you how you are. More than likely, your reply was an immediate ‘fine’. But is fine good enough? And why should we accept ‘fine’ as being as good as we can hope to feel on a daily basis?

Why is everyone merely ‘fine’ and, and what impact does ‘fine’ have on the way we view our lives and careers? Ultimately, ‘fine’ has become semantically void within the English Language, being used to express a sense of bland mediocrity, passive acceptance of one’s circumstances or even to subtly convey passive aggressive anger.

Though ‘fine’ appears outwardly innocuous, its effects can be toxic. Convincing ourselves that we must all be ‘fine’ all of the time is damaging, in that it absolves us of the responsibility to foster change in our lives. Whether you’re enduring a toxic relationship, or the job from Hell, constantly telling ourselves that everything is ‘fine’ prevents us from taking the action needed to improve our situation. Here are three reasons how we may be able to gain a deeper insight into our careers and emotional lives by ditching ‘fine’ by being more transparent with our feelings.

Be Honest with Yourself

If you can’t be totally honest with yourself, who can you be honest with? But sometimes it’s very easy to lie to yourself about your circumstances, when the alternative seems too painful. However, being completely honest with yourself is essential to beginning to realise the changes that must be made. It can be helpful to sit down with a pencil and a pad of paper and map out the areas of life which are causing you unnecessary stress, and lay out a plan of action in order to deal with these unwanted burdens.

Be Honest with Those Around You

The next step in effecting change is to express you desires to those around you! It is all too easy to use ‘fine’ as a veil to cover disappointment, or to express aggression in a passive way. Therefore, ‘fine’ does nothing to help others understand how they can help you. Start being more upfront about your feelings and you may find that situations which you previously found unmanageable are far easier to deal with.

Learn to Accept Weakness and Seek Help When Needed.  

‘Fine’ is not the glue holding your life together; hence, it is pointless to avoid accepting weakness to the point where you risk stress and disruption to your general wellbeing. It is far better to ask for guidance or help than it is to stubbornly deny our need for assistance with a glib ‘fine’. The British, especially, are very bad at expressing problems directly, and so ‘fine’ is employed to quickly diffuse situations perceived as potentially awkward. The next time you feel that your workload or personal relationships are getting out of control, reach out to those around you for help.

 

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